Everything Under The Sun
by PhoebeSnow
Summary: Steve and Bucky land safely in Wakanda, but when Natasha shows up, Bucky reacts in a way that is more than professional. Will Natasha have the courage to tell Steve what happened between she and his best friend all those years ago or will she stay true to her Black Widow alias and push him away?
1. A Bittersweet Surprise

Bucky and Steve landed safely in the country and King T'Challa greeted them both warmly. He had graciously given them quarters in the royal palace and also told them that they were his special guests and they could relax, as they had diplomatic immunity in Wakanda.

Food was sent up to their room immediately since T'Challa was certain that Steve and Bucky would be famished. Both men were tired but in need of baths, so they cleaned themselves up and ate the food hungrily.

Steve had been so focused on eating that he hadn't noticed someone enter until he saw Bucky's shoulders tense. Once he did, the blonde looked up cautiously and he stood when he saw her. " _Nat._.." he whispered, shock written all over his face.

The redhead smiled at both men and started walking towards them. "What? You didn't think you'd seen the last of me, did you, Rogers?"

Steve's lips curved into a smile and he began to walk to her. Seeing her there in front of him was like a dream. The last time he saw her, she let he and Bucky escape in the quinjet. Steve had to push back the horrible feelings in his gut that told him he would never see her again.

When Bucky looked up at her, he let out a sharp breath, dropping the piece of bread on his hands. His eyes were as wide as saucers and he just stared like he's just seen a ghost.

Before Steve even knew what was happening, Bucky forward and stopped in front of Natasha. He stared at her as if he couldn't believe what he saw. Several seconds later, he hugged her tightly. "Natalia...it **was** you at the airport." His Russian accent was soft and gentle.

Steve felt himself grow jealous as he watched Natasha's hands move up and hold Bucky around his back. He halted his steps and stood in place, unmoving. The inside of his stomach twisted painfully and he squeezed his hands into fists. Seeing Natasha and Bucky hold each other like that...it agitated him.

"I'm glad you're safe, James," Natasha whispered. She rubbed his back, knowing it would be best to just indulge him right now. It wasn't as if she could just turn him away. They had a history together and she owed him this.

It had been many years since they'd last seen each other. Once upon a time, Natasha even confessed to loving Bucky, but that was so long ago. Things were different now. It was good to know he was alive and in her arms. Her feelings for him weren't the same anymore, but she did still care about him.

Natasha looked up and caught hold of Steve angry blue eyes. She sighed. Of course, he would be surprised at her. She expected that. The anger was jarring, though, and it hurt to see that look of disapproval in Steve's eyes. All it took was one glance from him and Natasha felt like a child who had done something unspeakable. It was frustrating that he had this kind of power over her, and even more so because he didn't know about it.

 _What a mess you've gotten yourself into,_ she thought ruefully.

The little inner voice that told her not to come to Wakanda pestered her again. She couldn't deny that she did want to see Bucky again, but this was not how she thought things would go. And from his reaction to her intimate embrace with Bucky, Natasha knew that she and Steve had a lot to talk about...

* * *

There was only so much of the barely concealed and angry look on Steve's face that Natasha could take. Cursing under her breath, she let go of Bucky as if he were on fire. Damn, Steve Rogers always knew how to make people feel uncomfortable...

She walked over to the blonde with Bucky in tow.

The steely glare that Steve sent in her direction was not encouraging. He was obviously confused and angry that she never told him about she and Bucky. Goodness knows what was running around in his head right now? Still...how could she tell the man she loved that his best friend, the person he tried to find for over a year, was once her lover?

That's not exactly something you could just bring up over a candlelit dinner. Unfortunately, this meeting had to happen sooner or later and Natasha reluctantly chose to get it over with now. There was a sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach which told her that this could possibly be the nail in the coffin for she and Steve's relationship.

"You never told me that your name was Natalia," Steve said pointedly, bitterness edged in his tone. He shot accusatory glances at her and she fought the urge to defend herself.

 _He's just responding with his emotions. Don't follow his lead; it'll only exacerbate the situation._

In an attempt to defuse the awkward tension of the moment, Natasha spoke in a calm, steady voice. "I think we all need to sit down and talk. Steve?" She put her hand on his shoulder, but he shrugged it off.

He didn't even look at her when he said, "I'm going for a walk." Then he left.

This kind of behaviour from Steve was very foreign and Natasha heart sank as she watched him leave. There were a million different things that she wanted to say to him, but her lips could not move. She felt so...empty.

"What was that about, Natalia? Why did he just leave?" Bucky turned to look at his past lover, confusion written all over his face. The poor man had no clue what was going on between the two people who were closest to him. As much as she didn't want to tell him, Natasha knew there was no point in trying to hide the truth.

She sank down to the couch, put hands in her lap and stared at her legs. Right now, she could only get this out if she kept her eyes away from him. This was difficult enough to admit. "He thinks that you and I are together..." Her voice came out very strained and she ran a hand through her hair.

Bucky wrinkled his brow. "Together? Well...I guess from our hug, it would make sense that he'd assume as much. That still doesn't explain why he... _oh_." Suddenly, the reason why Steve would walk out so abruptly after their hugging became clear to him.

Natasha closed her eyes and rubbed her forehead. This was **not** how she wanted the evening to go.


	2. Standing Still Never Helped Anyone

Thankfully, Bucky wasn't saying much, just thinking. He guessed that, if it angered Steve to see Natasha hug him, then it might be possible there were feelings between the two of them. What's more, _unaddressed_ feelings.

That was very bad. When two people who have known and worked with each other for years begin to develop feelings, but never acknowledge how they feel or bring it out in the open, it could lead to misinterpretation when one of them is seen in the arms of another person. Particularly for people like Steve and Natasha.

Several minutes had passed before Bucky spoke. He walked back and forth in the room with his hands clasped behind his back, which would have been amusing, if the situation were different. He finally looked at Natasha with a new light in his eyes.

"Why haven't you told Steve that you love him?"

Natasha's head whipped up and she stared at Bucky with widened eyes. She hadn't expected to hear that from anyone, especially _him_. Being taken by surprise was not her favourite thing in the world and this was definitely not an exception.

Coolly, she crossed her arms and sent him a slightly bored look, scoffing. "And what would make you say a thing like that?"

Bucky just stared at Natasha for a few seconds, then he sank down to the couch and grabbed her hands with his own. She flinched at the motion and furrowed her brow, trying to understand what he was doing.

"Natalia...you can't lie to me. We've known each other too long for you to pull the wool over my eyes." His voice was as calm as ever and it made her nervous. She knew that Bucky was right. They had too much history for him to not recognise the signs that she was putting on an act, but this was different. This was about _Steve_.

Agitated, she stood up and walked over to a nearby window. Unfortunately, it was too far down for her to jump, or else she would have to escape this conversation.

All of her life, Natasha had been very careful to keep her emotions at bay and hold people at an arm's length. With Steve, it was not the same.

She couldn't treat him like he was just another faceless person she knew in her line of work. He used to be, and for all intent and purposes, **still** was her partner. They worked together, side by side, for years. There was a strong bond of trust between the two of them that would never go away, no matter how much time passed.

There _could_ have been something more between them if either had the guts to test it, but they always kept things friendly and platonic. This was a decision that Natasha was beginning to regret more and more every day.

She stiffened when she felt Bucky's hand touch her shoulder. "Natalia...if you want to be with Steve, then you'll have to tell him about us. After our meeting earlier, I'd say you kind of owe him that much. He doesn't react so well when people hide things from him. I'm sure you know that by now."

A single tear slid down Natasha's cheek and she wiped it away quickly. Things would just escalate further if she started having a meltdown. "Who says I owe him anything? You haven't been around long enough to know what my relationship with Steve is like. He's different when he's with me. Besides, I highly doubt he'd expect me to tell him my life story."

The words sounded so hollow coming from NAtasha's lips. It was a weak comeback, but she was still on the defensive when it came to she and Steve. As a matter of fact, she'd always been that way. Maybe it was because she saw the good in him, the purity, the innocence of his soul, that she didn't want to see it tainted by the world...or by her.

Steve Rogers was honest, decent and just. He was a hero to his core and people looked up to him. Natasha was also one of those people, although she never told him so. Being around him was like breathing in the fresh air after a morning rain. He made her feel clean and whole. He made her feel that there was a chance she wasn't so far from redemption as she believed.

As wonderful as Steve was, Natasha couldn't help thinking that she wasn't good enough. Of course she loved him, but whenever she looked at him, she felt inspired to be a better person than she was now. Still, with all of the blood in her ledger and the unspeakable things she committed in her past, Natasha couldn't see how it would be possible for her to be with him. Steve needed a woman who was pure like him, and strong and intelligent. Even though Natasha fit the bill on the last two, she was not pure by a long shot. Maybe she never would be...

Bucky had a feeling that he knew what was going on in her mind. They may have not seen each other in many years, but he still could tell when she was distraught about something. "Stop. You're not the kind of person who pities herself, Natalia. Don't you dare start now." He put his arm around her cautiously, letting her know that it was okay if she didn't want him near. However, she allowed herself to relax against him and he touched her elbow.

"We all have a history, even Steve. Good or bad, it doesn't matter. I don't doubt that it took him a bit of time before he even talked to you about his life before he got the serum, right?"

The redhead nodded silently as the memories of that first conversation came to her mind. It had been a little over a year ago. They were on a mission in Bosnia, taking out a handful violent Serbian rebels who managed to get a vial of a knockoff super soldier serum. After taking care of the rebels, Steve and Natasha had camped outside in the night air a few hundred feet away from their morning airlift location.

Natasha had been on the verge of sleep when Steve woke her up by telling her about his mother, Sarah Rogers. It was out of character for him to just open up out of the blue like that. Perhaps it had something to do with the unusually chilly weather they'dfound themselves in at the time. It could be that the cold weather took his mind back to that moment decades ago when he crashed the Red Skull's plane into the Arctic.

Sometimes, when a person experiences a tragic event in their life, they regress into that moment again. The best way to stop it from taking place was to talk about the good things from that period of their life. For Steve, since he spent a lot of his time with Natasha, it was natural for him to confide in her. So, as she snuggled up next to him to keep them both warm, he began to talk about life in the forties and about what his mother, Bucky and Peggy had been like back then.

It was a wonderful thing, seeing Steve's face light up as he told Natasha of his old life pre-serum. He let her in and dropped his defenses. He told her about his abusive father, the struggles he had growing up sick, life after the serum and his work in the army. Natasha was so touched that he felt she was worthy enough to know more about him than what was in his SHIELD files or at the museum - she would never tell him so, but she had gone to that museum many times to gorge herself over his history and she read those SHIELD files on him dozens of times in the privacy of her apartment. To be honest, she had a bit of a crush on him back then.

Steve Rogers was bigger than life. He was a national icon, an image of America's greatness, but, at the same time, he was also a man. He was a man who needed someone to understand him, to see the little guy who was still a part of his soil, the man who wanted to jump to someone's rescue when they were being bullied or oppressed. He did have big muscles, but he had an equally big heart. It was that same heart which captured Natasha's own and made her fall more in love with him every day as they worked together.

"Bucky, I...I don't know if he could accept that from me." Natasha knew she sounded defeatist, but it was hard not to. It was true that she needed a place to lie low for a while, but honestly, she could do that anywhere. She may have blown her covers two years ago, but she still knew how to disappear better than anyone. The fact is that Steve was the only reason, the only _person_ keeping her in Wakanada.

Right now, she was feeling the tug of her 'fight or flight' response.

"You already know that you need to be with him. I could see it in your eyes when both of you looked at each other. Natalia...go to him."

Natasha looked at Bucky's pleading eyes, and her heart began to pound with less intensity and her breathing slowed. She closed her eyes for a moment to think.

It was true. No matter if it hurt for him to hear, Steve deserved to know the truth about Natasha and his best friend. In the past, she had told him about the Red Room, but purposely left Bucky out of it. Back then, she wasn't sure how Steve would have reacted to the knowledge that his best friend and the woman he'd grown very close to were once lovers.

Steve didn't like it when people hid things from him. It made him suspicious of their motives and that was never good for him. As Captain America and as Steve Rogers. There was only so many times Natasha could keep things from him before he shut down and wouldn't let her get close to him anymore.

 **That** was more terrifying than him knowing about her shared past with Bucky. If she ever felt that Steve was going to give up on her, she would die. She was sure of it, more than anything else. And this thought was enough to spur her on.

Turning to the brunette beside her, she smiled and gave him a hug. "Bucky...thank you."

The man smiled and hugged her back. He didn't have to ask what she decided; it was in her voice when she spoke.

"Go get 'im, Natalia," he whispered to her.

Once she pulled back from Bucky, she gave him a wink and ran out the door. As her feet carried her through the streets, she felt a sense of sweet release. There was no chance of her stopping. Not until she found Steve and made him understand that he was everything to her and she couldn't and _wouldn't_ live without him.


	3. Better Than This

After searching high and low for what felt like an hour, Natasha finally found Steve. He was sitting by a river that ran through the Wakandan forest. His back was to her and she approached him stealthily, coming up behind him. Part of her was still afraid that he would turn her away, but the other, stronger part of her told her to stay.

"Steve," she said quietly.

His head moved to the side and he gave her a sidelong glance. The look on his face wasn't angry like it was when he'd seen her hug Bucky. Instead, he seemed...pensive and thoughtful, as if he'd realized something while in solitude.

He wasn't saying anything, just watching her with careful eyes and it made her nervous. Natasha Romanoff had been many things in her life, but before she met Steve, she never really understood how anxious being near another person could make her feel.

Her mind was going a million different places at once and it was hard to focus. Unsure of how to word what she wanted to say, she wrung her hands desperately and looked at the ground. This was unbelievable! She felt like an awkward teenager or something absurd like that! These kind of things didn't happen to her, ever.

"Nat, I know."

Her head snapped up and her mouth opened, a near inaudible _"What?"_ coming from her lips.

Steve stood up and slowly made his way over to her. Natasha found it boggling to be so excited and frightened by the presence of this man. He stood tall and his eyes bored into her as though he could see right through her skin. She'd never understood what feeling naked under a person's gaze felt like until now.

Natasha wanted to reach out and touch him, squeeze his hand, bury her face in his chest, anything to be nearer to him, but she was glued to the spot. She had to know what he meant.

Taking a deep breath, Steve spoke. "I've known about you and Bucky for a while now."

The redhead's eyebrows shot up in the air and she wanted to ask him how on earth had he ever found out about she and his best friend. Then, it occurred to her. The SHIELD files. All of that classified information she dumped onto the internet a couple of years ago. A few of them gave the details of Bucky's assignment as her trainer when she was a part of the Red Room.

Of course she knew that knowledge would be available, but she never thought that Steve would find out about it. For that matter, she didn't know that she'd grow to care for him the way she did now. Life certainly gave you a handful of surprises when you weren't expecting them.

"What do you mean, you knew? Did you just happen to feel like going online and reading up everything there was on me or something?" Natasha laughed awkwardly.

Yes, it was a colossally stupid thing to say. Yes, she knew that he didn't judge her for her past, but she couldn't help feeling a little worried. Had something he'd read changed the way he looked at her? If she ever lost Steve's faith in her, she wouldn't want to live.

"No. Someone sent them to me. I don't know who. One day, I just looked in my emails and all the information was there." Honesty and concern was etched on Steve's features and as Natasha watched him, a sense of relief swept over her and she felt herself relax a little.

Of course Steve wouldn't have purposely looked up the files that SHIELD had on her. It was foolish of her to even ask him that, but these damn nerves had her more anxious than she'd ever been in her entire life.

Natasha shook her head. "I'm sorry. That...that was a ridiculous thing to say. I know you'd never..." She broke off her sentence and rubbed her arms, disliking the vulnerability of her situation.

The blonde merely gave her a small smile and waved his hand, dismissing it. "Nat, it's fine. You were on the defensive. Believe me, I probably would be too if I were in your shoes. It's alright."

Natasha blinked back tears and chuckled in disbelief. How could he do that? How could he allay her fears so quickly and touch her heart while doing so? _God_ , she wanted to kiss him. Better to take her mind off that for now.

She stepped back. "That just doesn't make sense to me, though. Why would someone send the files to you when we're teammates? You'd think people would assume that we know everything about each other after I released all of the SHIELD files online."

Steve took a step closer. "Maybe it came from an ex-KGB operative...or a Red Room spy." Natasha flinched when he said this. In all the years she'd known Steve, she never thought that she'd hear him say those two words. She crossed her arms as he continued.

"It could be someone who wanted to ruin the relationships you've started. For all we know, it could have been part of a back up plan from Zemo. Right now, I don't even care."

They were standing mere inches apart now, and Natasha could hear her heart pounding in her ears. Her hands were clammy and she looked up at Steve, lips trembling. He took her by the arms and held her close.

There was a fire in Steve's eyes that Natasha had never seen before. She swallowed and licked her lips as he came nearer. How he intoxicated her with his very presence. She whispered, "And just what do you care about?"

Steve brushed his knuckles against her cheek and said softly, "You."

Natasha covered his hand with her own and sighed. She'd never dreamed that she would be in this moment, with Steve's hand caressing her face. The protective look in his eyes made her blush.

As much as she wanted to feel his lips against hers, she still needed to say something about what happened earlier. "Steve, back when Bucky hugged me...I just should have made you stay and listen to me. I know it wasn't the best thing in the world, seeing him hug me and I think-"

Before she could go on, Steve pressed his finger to her lips. He shook his head. "You don't have to apologise, Nat. That was my fault. You shouldn't have gone after me; I should have made myself stay." He ran a hand through his blonde locks. "For the first time in a long time, I felt...jealous. That's not such a good feeling, you know."

The redhead opened and closed her mouth a few times, but found that she had no words to say. _Steve Rogers_? _Jealous_ of someone? That was definitely a rare occurrence. If this were a lighthearted situation, she would probably laugh at him in mockery.

"You were jealous of me...and Bucky?"

The faint pink blush on Steve's face made it clear that he was embarrassed about the way he felt. Natasha knew he wasn't the kind of man to be at ease admitting this to her, but she was glad they were finally getting everything out in the open.

"Yeah. And I know I hurt you by leaving like that, but seeing you in his arms and hearing him call you by your Russian name...it was too much. I know that's no excuse for what I did. I acted like an ass."

Natasha smirked as she replied, "Language, Rogers."

Steve laughed at her remark and moved a strand of hair away from her face. He kissed the top of her head before pulling her closer to him, so their foreheads rested against each other. They embraced for several minutes, then Steve spoke.

"Forgive me?" He asked her quietly.

"Yeah. You're forgiven." She moved back slightly and grazed her lips against his gently.

They stayed like this for a while, nestled in a close embrace, until Steve began tensing up. He pulled back from her and Natasha looked at him curiously. "What is it?"

He rested his hand against her cheek. Her heartbeat sped up again as he gazed down at her. There was something so tender and passionate in his eyes. It made her hold her breath in anticipation.

Steve took a deep breath and gave her a small smile. "Nat, I...I love you."

After he said that, Natasha felt like she just might faint, which was absurd because she wasn't the fainting type. Nevertheless, her legs began to buckle and Steve, sensing what was going to happen, wrapped his arms around her waist and held her securely.

Tears brimmed in her eyes and she did her best to blink them away. "Do you...really mean that?"

Steve wiped away the wetness on her cheeks and kissed the damp skin. She never looked more beautiful to him than in this moment. "Yes. I mean it more than anything in the world. You captivate me, Nat. You make me feel like I could do anything. I can't tell you how scared I was after you let me and Bucky go in the quinjet. I was sure I'd never see you again and I thought I'd lost my only chance to tell you..."

The grief in his voice touched Natasha and she held her finger up in front of his mouth. "Shh, Steve. It's alright. We're both here now and we're safe. That's the only thing that matters."

Steve nodded. "You're right."

The redhead smiled and let her fingers run through Steve's hair. "Mm, I hate sounding like a copycat, but...I love you too."

A look of childlike wonder appeared on Steve's face. His lips spread into a grin and the most beautiful laugh came from his mouth. Natasha had always loved the deep, melodic sound of Steve's laughter. It wasn't something she was used to hearing very often, but when she did, she savored it.

"You mean it?"

She cocked her head to the side and smiled as she lie her hands on his chest. "Yes. I'll be honest with you, Steve. For now and always."

Steve rested his hands on her hips. "Well, since this is out in the open, I think another kiss is in order."

"I think you're right."

Their lips met in a gentle, yet passionate kiss. As they held each other in that moment, Natasha knew that everything would be alright because she had the man she loved by her side, and with him, she could do anything.


End file.
